Gypsy Child

Juma,

When I ask you to pay attention to the route we were taking on our trip to the University of Central Florida (UCF) in Orlando it was not simply to learn where we were going, it was more than that. It was to be awake to what is happening in your life when it is happening. Take advantage of the moments where life is teaching you a lesson.

Life doesn’t always have lessons for you. Some moments are truly there just for the moment. That moment my come with laughter, joy, pain, love, first love, old love. The list goes on.

Right now I am just talking about being in the moment where life is presenting you with an opportunity to move forward in love.

I am also talking about life presenting you with an easy lesson. Like for instance your mom learning an easy way to get somewhere near the college you are going to but if you don’t pay attention you might end up getting lost and having to find your own way.

All this while you are in the same car with her and she tries to explain to you what just happened but you say “Don’t try to tell me because I will not remember any of it.” and I say, “But if you would just try to listen, the next time you hear it, it will be that much easier to understand.”

This is the tug of war that goes on between most children and their parents.

When will children learn life could be easier if they would just pay attention and when will adults learn their kids need to learn it in their own time in their own way.

But for now we will go forward with the message of moving-forward-in-love thing.

Story number 1

Getting lost on my way to Orlando today, I went in the gas station to buy a new Florida map. Mine dated back in the 80’s. I knew I was also going to ask for directions from whomever was working.

Two women were working. On first appearance, life did not look like it had swung many dollars their way. They were southern women who had probably lived many a years working long hours and minimum wage. Exercise and diet were not a high priority nor was dental.

“Hi, My map is pretty old so I want to buy this map but could you also tell me how to get to I-4,” pointing on the new map I also ask, “Is this toll road around Orlando better than going thru the center?”

The woman behind the counter, looking befuddled, calls the other women over, “Sandy, you want to help her, your much better with directions.”

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Found this on internet, I added all the Bolds.

1. Do a cartwheel. 
2. Sing into your hairbrush. Really just sing, can’t be mad when your singing
3. Walk barefoot in wet grass. Watch out for red ants and poop, Florida/gated community
4. Play a song you like really loud, over and over. I often do this when no one is home
5. Dot all your “i”’s with smiley faces. Cute
6. Read the funnies. Throw the rest of the paper away. recycle
7. Dunk your cookies. Graham crackers in milk, Yum
8. Play a game where you make up the rules as you go along. I do this everyday, It’s called life.
9. Step carefully over sidewalk cracks. Double Cute
10. Change into some play clothes.   Double Double Cute
11. Try to get someone to trade you a better sandwich. I hate bread
12. Eat ice cream for breakfast.  No Problem
13. Kiss a frog, just in case. No way
14. Blow the wrapper off a straw. We already do this
15. Have someone read you a story. Me and Raina trade turns reading
16. Find some pretty stones and save them. Always
17. Wear your favorite shirt with you favorite pants even if they don’t match. What does match mean?
18. Take a running jump over a big puddle. I love to do this
19. Get someone to buy you something you really don’t need. Who? Anyone want to volunteer?
20. Hide your vegetables under your napkin.  But I love them.
21. Stay up past your bedtime. It’s 2:15am right now, I think that counts.
22. Eat dessert first. How about just dessert? Nothing else.
23. Fuss a little, then take a nap.  Everyday.
24. Wear red gym shoes. Buy them for me and I will
25. Put way too much sugar on your cereal.  I would not enjoy this.
26. Make cool screeching noises every time you turn a corner. That sounds like fun.
27. Giggle a lot for no reason. I believe the reason is called stress reduction
28. Give yourself a gold star for everything you do today. How about a piece of dark chocolate?

We Choose Love is a sweet web site to check out. I love the photos. Very uplifting even though it is a bit sappy and new agey.

 This poem is good to think about but certainly does not describe everyone.

Dalai Lama

The Paradox of Our Age

by The Dalai Lama

 

We have bigger houses but smaller families;

More conveniences, but less time;

We have more degrees, but less sense;

More knowledge, but less judgment;

More experts, but more problems;

More medicines, but less healthiness;

We’ve been all the way to the moon and back,

but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.

We build more computers to hold more information to

produce more copies than ever but have less communication.

We have become long on quantity,

but short on quality.

These are times of fast foods but slow digestion;

Tall man but short character;

Steep profits but shallow relationships.

It’s a time when there is much in the window,

but nothing in the room.

The big question is did he really write this? When researching it on the web I found this below, so let me know what you know or think or find out.

By Dr. Bob Moorehead, former pastor of Seattle’s Overlake Christian Church

These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one- night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet to kill. It is a time where there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom.

We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

Indeed it’s all true.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and lie too often. We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life; we’ve added years to life, not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.

We’ve conquered outer space, but not inner space; we’ve done larger things, but not better things; we’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we’ve split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more, but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less; we’ve learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes, but lower morals; more food, but less appeasement; more acquaintances, but fewer friends; more effort, but less success.

We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication; we’ve become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men and short character; steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure and less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition.

These are the days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes.

God, I’m so scared.

I’m driving home from the movie theater.

Actually my son, Jeremy is driving.

He drives so fast at times. Most of the time. He darts into spaces I would never consider. He drives close to the car in front of him at high speeds. It feels as though we will crash. At the last second he darts into the other lane.

I quietly scream out “Jeremy slow down or Jeremy watch out.” As quickly as I release my anguish we are in the next lane. Safe. For the moment we are safe. But still we are driving. At high speeds.

I recite the “wrap in white light” prayer many times silently.

“The white light of God surrounds us, the love of God embraces us, the strength of God protects us, the wisdom of God watches over us. Where ever we are, God is, and all is well”.

This is my mantra. I use it when I remember but always while afraid. Fear releases it from my memory instantaneously. It calms me.

But still I sit quietly in the backseat, alone, thinking how scared I am. Only this time it is a more general overall scared. We are driving on the exit and my life is no longer under immediate danger.

The experience opens the door for an even greater fear. One that will never leave me as long as I am alive. “God I am so scared.”  I remember the depth of my fear I have for my children.

Every moment of their lives feels as though they are walking in a field of land mines. There is no direct war in my country. No real physical land mines, but land mines just the same.

Every time they get into a car or a bus or a plane I know there are dangers. Dangers of what one bad move can do. Danger when they go out to a bar or a dance or these days just going to school.

I pray their guardian angels are on there side. But I am sure that youths that have passed away had their guardian angels on their side. I watched Ruby Rutnik grow up. She was a vibrant happy child. A beauty for the eye to behold. When she was 21 years old she was a passenger in a car that crashed. She broke her neck and died instantly. I know her guardian angel was there. But still she died. So the comfort of a guardian angel cannot hold me.

It has to be something greater than that. Something deeper.

How about these; will these comfort me?

Khalil Gibran, in his book The Prophet said:

“Your children are not your children, they are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you yet they belong not to you.”

Or, “you cannot begin to understand the scope of the universe and its purpose. We all have a purpose in this life and only God knows when that time is over.”

Or, “they lived a rich, loving life.”

These have all been used by me at one time or another. They calm me when I am mostly calm already.

But moments like this, where I have taken a small fear and built it into a mountain, moments like this are hard to calm.

So I decide to not calm it but to explore it; open the hole of fear up a little wider in hope of understanding it.

I try to open my heart hole and feel inside. The fear hole covers the heart hole. It is like a shield of protection. The fear is protecting my heart so it won’t hurt so much.

A little protection is good and important. It should be like a fine mist or like eye lashes flickering over the eye.

But I have somehow put a heavy iron shield over my heart.

This is why when I find myself in this moment of vulnerability I can use it to my advantage. I can use this moment of vulnerability if I take the time to do so.

Today I take the time.

I peak inside and look at the fear.

Then I ask myself what would happen if I removed the shield for this one thought. Just this one little thought. Would my fear come true? Will I die or will one of my children die in that very moment when that fear is exposed.

The answer seems to be No…No they will not vanish from me.

I open it a little further.

Am I protecting them from future accidents?    No I believe this fear is not protecting them.

I allow myself to remember that they are separate spirits. We are separate souls that have our own reasons for existing. They came through my body to be on this earth.

I was the passageway. . I was the one to feed and nurture them but I am not the one that controls their destiny.

I am not them. They are not me.

Intellectually we know this, but emotionally we forget this. Emotionally we feel we are in control of their lives. We are the reason for every thing they do. Good and bad. We are the one that has to move the strings in the right and proper direction.

But on a deep soul level we understand this is not true. We remember we are here to nurture and that is all. Our children are not attached to us by any strings. We cannot control anything. We can only love them. They have there own destinies. They have there own life lessons.

It is important for us to remember this and to trust the higher force of understanding.

This is what I see when I tear open my heart.

This is what I remember.

A deep sigh releases from me. It is acceptance, trust and resignation braided together.

I can move forward in life less fearful for now.

I allow that fear to release to the higher universe that can understand and embrace it and turn it into love.

I imagine it fluttering away like a butterfly.

I know that fear has a place of importance in my life, like every single thing. Everything of light and darkness has its place of importance.

I embrace it; I give it thanks and then release it to the universe of higher understanding.

As a side not to this post, my son really drives safe, he has a much better eye than me for where the traffic is and what is going on. When I am not at the wheel and in control all actions seem exaggerated, all movements seem extreme when considering for 20 years I lived on an island 9miles by 9miles and no traffic signals.

Do you have any stories of your fears and how you help to overcome them? I’d love to hear them.